Road head sucks if your girl is a spitter and you don’t have a cup in the car.

All sexually active people should shave, no excuses.  Flossing with pubes is quite possibly the least sexy thing of all time.

Ever have to pee when you stand up after taking a poo?  Quit jerking off while pooping.

Have you ever met a girl on the street you didn’t want to fuck?  Yeah, me neither.

Except lesbian porn. Watching lesbian porn while fucking would be pretty hot.

Porn is a lot like remembering sex one has already had, you get all the images and emotions, but none of the touchy feely stuff. For this reason, real sex will always supersede porn.

Pussies are useful, but not attractive. Tits are attractive, but useless. It would be more ideal if a pair of tits had a pussy between them, but that would mean motorboating could lead to STDs (a definite downer).

When you are a 17 year old male, the world is your cumdumpster

Boobs should definitely be more ubiquitous, seriously, there should be topless girls everywhere.  I’m sick of imagining them, just isn’t the same.

For some unknown reason, one pair of massive tits isn’t very attractive on its own.  However, add a second, equally massive pair of tits and you have yourself one hell of a porno.